April 17, 2007

Random Thoughts Volume 3295023487059

Random Thoughts Volume 3295023487059

1. First and foremost, my heart goes out to those students at Virginia Tech and their families. It's beyond words. I can't get it out of my mind though that we Americans are so inured to this type of thing that it's almost normal now. When I was in Sydney, I watched the news every day I was there and the worst story was a ferry boat crash in which neither of the drivers was drunk. I was floored. I mean seriously, a horrific crash and no one was drunk. Later on at a bar, I overheard two guys talking about how someone had gotten carjacked a few months back. They were flabbergasted at such an occurrence. Carjackings don't even make the news here anymore. Eh, this is a longer conversation, one that I'm not really in the mood to have right now.

2. The last 7 search strings for my site were:

"coupons for strip clubs nyack" (HAHAHAHA can you imagine busting out coupons at a strip joint "Good For One Free Lap Dance When You Purchase One At Full Price.")
"what is danger of wawa green tea"
"snorting tequila"
"why do people gangbang"
"Hey, Brian, remember me? I'm the guy you left standing at the counter at McDonald's with a bag full of burgers. You know it's funny, I tried to walk home and, um, a lot of hungry deer walking around"
"San Diego male stripper abel pictures" (Sneaky, I didn't know Abel was stripping these days.)
"Jewish midgets"

3. Mojo had a post awhile back where he said that bloggers often end up censoring themselves where he said "Either that or you let everyone know what a depraved perverted asshole you really are." That's pretty much been my gameplan all these years but I have a feeling that one of these days this blog is going to bite me in the ass. I've had friends who have gotten fired, sued and even one whose blog was used against him in a criminal court case. Insanity. I'm kind of dreading the idea that one day the words "But your Honor, that was A JOKE" will leave my mouth.

4. Kwame and I have nothing to say about 24 except that a) We could both do without the idiotic President/VP storyline and b) If we were Jack we wouldn't have played the "You Owe Me" card to save Audrey Raines of all people, we'd use it to get a lifetime supply of free food, wine, women and prime tickets to various sporting events. Level one 50-yard line baby.

5. Speaking of which, the "Madden Curse" (pro athletes who have appeared on the cover of the Madden game have either gotten injured or had crappy seasons in that year) is apparently stalking LaDainian Tomlinson. You all know how much me and Kwam love LT. Every football fan should love LT. Some Chargers fans have started a petition to keep their star player from becoming cursed. I put my LT jersey that Tony got me on and THEN went and signed it. The fans who are signing with "Put Tom Brady on the cover" are killing me. I spit out my water when I read it and laughed.

6. I was outside my house yesterday and a couple of the workers doing construction on the house next door called to me. The conversation went like this:

Worker: Can I ask you a question?
Me: Sure.
Worker: What is your dog's name?
Me: His name is Wolfie, why?
Worker: Well I always hear you yelling "farfegnugen" at him... What does that mean?
Me: Oh well uh, Wolfie is short for "Wolfgang" which is a German name so I sometimes randomly yell German to him. Except that I don't speak German so I'm really just limited to "Achtung" which means stop and "Nien" which means no and "verboten" which means forbidden and... "farfegnugen" which is something in the Volkswagen ads in Germany.
Worker: So you're yelling "Volkswagen" at him?
Me: Well not exactly it means something else but.. yeah okay, pretty much.

(Hey does anyone speak German? I could use a few more phrases. How do you say "Dammit you fucking dog, stop licking that other dog's penis, it's gross.")

7. I haven't been playing my guitar much since I got back (we can pretend that's the Evil Jet Lag Demon's fault too along with my lag on posting up pics and the rest of the videos) but I started again a few days ago. So if anyone has any recommendations for good acoustic songs let me know. So far I've taught myself Nobody Knows (Tony Rich Project) and my guitar teacher (Steve) has taught me:

Zombie (The Cranberries)
Wherever You Will Go (The Calling)
What's Up (4 Non Blondes)
Save Tonight (Eagle Eye Cherry)
All I Want Is You (U2)
Love Is All Around (Wet Wet Wet) - We actually refer to this song as the "I Don't Care Song" because we re-wrote the lyrics from "I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes. Love is all around me, and so the feeling grows" to "I do not care... I do not fucking care. In case you didn't hear me, I do not fucking care."
Chasing Cars (Snow Patrol)
All My Life (Jodeci)
Every Body Hurts (REM)
Unchained Melody (The Righteous Brothers)

Keep in mind the slower songs are good for me right now, up until I left for Sydney I'd only been playing a month.

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