Winter Cleaning

Winter Cleaning

So Geo and I have been attempting to clean the house lately. I say "attempting" because it's difficult to do anything other than feed babies, change diapers and get puked on when taking care of newborns. It's interesting to clean the house with your husband:

Me: Who's sweater is this?
Geo: It's mine.
Me: Do you want to keep it or does it go in the pile for Goodwill?
Geo: Nahh toss it, some slut I banged once back in the day bought it for me.

It's really not fair that men get to sound so dismissive about women, so easily. "Toss it, some manwhore I banged once back in the day gave it to me" just doesn't have the same effect. Neither does "Oh yeah he's just some he-slut I hit it with a few years back." See?? Boring. Okay, my moment of verbal penis envy is over. Geo's stories are funny as hell though. If you ever hang out with him, get him to tell you about the naked chic he had to stuff in the closet, because his ex came downstairs. I love that story. Although it's really not fair that if a girl told the same story from her perspective, people would think she was a ho. Like society finds it amusing when it happens to a man, but if a woman said "So I had to stuff some random naked guy I was banging into a closet because my husband came home..." people would laugh but privately be thinking "you slut."

Anyway, one thing that all this cleaning has brought to my attention is that Geo and I have a lot of crap. And by "crap" I don't mean the real thing (although we have a lot of that too thanks to my idiot dogs) but rather stuff that serves little or no purpose. I really need to Ebay some stuff. I have enough clothes to dress the inhabitants of a small country. And people will buy anything on EBay, even used socks. Actually, some chic was auctioning off her soiled underwear... freaks. Both the auctioneer and the people buying them. And Geo has a lot of clothes from his crazy houser days. I don't know what the appropriate term is for those weirdos who dress like the world is a rave. Not that Geo is a weirdo or anything. Weirdos are those people that carry around dollheads as an expression of anti-establishment angst.