June 16, 2005

Confessions and Feedback

Confessions and Feedback

Wouldn't it be GREAT if you could leave feedback (like on E-Bay) on that site where people confess shit, grouphug.us?

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These would be the responses to the confessions I um, screenshot.

1. Yes, you are a waste of human life. But I was addicted to IRC once and was able to overcome it and be less of a waste of human life. You can too. I believe in you. But first, go clean your room and stop wallowing in your own filth you pig.

2. Yes, being divorced can be liberating. Until you wake up one day next to some guy whose name you can't remember and your underwear has chew marks on it. This is all um, hypothetical of course.

3. So what happens at the end then, does air come out of your penis? Or does it just build up into a frenzy and then... nothing. Because dude, that SUCKS.

4. As detestable as your friend may be, wishing that she'd kill herself is as detestable. Just in case there's karma in this world, better stay away from the edge of train platforms and refrain from vacationing anywhere natural disasters occur.

5. I guess it's better to pee alone in the shower than pee on someone in the shower. But what do you mean by "can't help?" As in, the moment the spray hits you it's an inadvertent release? It could be worse. At least you're in the shower. It could have been that you can't help but pee when you hear the phone ring or you can't help but pee while you cook.

6. Dude, I feel you. I cried like hell when Eric Clapton's son died too. I even get teary when I hear "Tears In Heaven." That whole thing was sad as hell.

7. If "B" is gay and you want to have butt sex with him then just keep pretending you're straight and that he has a chance of converting you. It works on women. What's a good way to capture a woman's interest? Pretend you have no interest in her at all. Works like a charm. Then she sits there and goes "Wait, I'm cute, why doesn't he want to kick it to me?" Then she starts getting flirty and paying more attention to you. Then you do, and she bounces for some other guy. Not that you care about this "K", you want to do the backdoor bonanza with B.

8. Okay but remember, it's not a good sign if it burns when you pee.

9. And they say cooperation is dead. Maybe you guys could sell the jar on E-bay and split the profit. However, I think maybe the jar is just a symbol for where you and your roommate really want to make your deposits.

Come on.... wouldn't feedback on that site be fun?? I guess it would kind of kill the point of non-judgement though. You know, like I just did.

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