News

So the feds just indicted members of a child pornography ring perpetrated by the parents of the molested children. Bastards. Let me once again state how good it is that I'm not Queen of the World otherwise these people would be sentenced to death by multiple baseball bats being shoved up their asses and pulled out their mouths. I don't know why the Founding Fathers thought this whole cruel and unusual punishment thing was such a bad idea. What else should be done with murderers, rapists, child molestors, car thieves and men who cheat on their pregnant girlfriends with one of her friends.

My friend Melanie recently applied for a job with the tree huggers but received a letter stating that she was "unsuccessful." Three days later she got an e-mail from them again, asking for her help to find a person to fill the spot she was turned down for:

"I recently sent you a note indicating that you have been unsuccessful for the Greenpeace position. I and Greenpeace need your help. Perhaps you may know someone who has a background closer to our needs. They will need strong staff management skills and, ideally, some experience in Government/NGOs. So if you do know someone could you let them or us know. This could be doing them, Greenpeace and yourself a great favour!"

What a bunch of idiots. That's like me shooting some guy down at a bar, then saying "I'm sorry that you are unsuccessful. I am looking for someone far better-looking and with a higher salary than you. If you know anyone who fits this description that you don't, please give them my phone number. You will be doing your friend, me and yourself a great favor." Then again, it's not like I had high expectations of the intellectual capabilities of people who work for Greenpeace anyway. How much brainpower could it possibly take to stand on a boat and hold up some protest sign. So maybe the two tactless letters aren't that surprising after all.

I've been surfing all over Asian Avenue all day because I'm bored as hell. On my girl Michi's page I found a link to the former Slambook.com so I created my own slambook for you people who are as bored as I am. If you even exist. I haven't read a slam book since junior high school. God, I am so gay sometimes.

I've been trying to win Aerosmith tickets on EBay, to no avail. I always said if I could go to one concert ever I would want it to be Aerosmith. But the tickets sold out mad fast, even to the Camden show. Who the hell is going to see Aerosmith, that lives in Camden?? *sigh* Anyway I've been wanting to see them for years but I kept missing their shows. I can't help but feel like the clock is ticking, because they're like 60 years old and eventually they're going to run out of the energy it takes to run up and down a stage like a banshee every other day. I'm 26 and I don't have that energy. They must be smoking some good ass shit.