Weekend Roundup
On Friday night Tony, Pete, Juan and I decided to be typical Asians and stay home and play mah jong for hours. The game ended early at midnight because Pete and Juan had to go mountain biking the next day. They invited me along but I have this weird aversion to pain and so graciously declined ("Are you on crack???")

The next day me, Geo, Pete and Juan went to some bar/lounge by Union Square called "Nativa." What a godawful place. We got there and waited in line for about 10 minutes, then the bouncer came and pulled a group of about 40 white people he didn't even know from the back of the line and let them in. Then he told the rest of the line that it would be at least 30 minutes before they let anyone else in. One chic signing in people at the door looked nervous because the disgruntled rumblings of the people left in line (all of whom were black, Asian or spanish) were getting fairly loud. I won't repeat the comments here. This is a family weblog. Okay not really. I think one of the bar promoters got upset though because I read his lips when he was talking to the bouncer who did it ("That's fucking bullshit") and a few minutes after the bouncer said no one was going in for half an hour, they let us in. You will all be happy to know that I didn't walk up to the bouncer in question and scream at him. But that's only because I had to pee so bad, I wouldn't have been even remotely coherent. Plus we couldn't leave because Allan and Tony were already inside. I would have left them and gone elsewhere but Pete wanted to wait it out. I really hate bouncers. I am determined to one day meet a decent one but as yet it hasn't happened yet. It's like human nature is so weak that even if people are given a teensy amount of power they still feel compelled to abuse it. Maybe I'm getting old. I'm actually surprised that I didn't yell at this guy.

Once, a group of my co-workers and I were in Chicago for the 98 NBA Finals and this idiot bouncer wouldn't let me in because he said my California ID was fake. I asked him how he could possibly know that being that he told me he'd never actually seen one before. California IDs at the time were kind of a novelty because they were thick like credit cards, when most state IDs were made of laminated paper. So he replies that he knows because he read some book that said if you bend a real California ID in half, it won't make a cracking noise. And he proceeded to bend my (very real) ID completely in half. I went ballistic. Three of my co-workers had to pull me away and into a cab. My friend Steber said he knew the guy was in trouble when I said "Let me explain to you the chemical properties of plastic... and I'll be sure to use very small words so that you'll be sure to understand." I hate bouncers. I have to update my list of people I hate:

People I Hate
1. Child molestors, murderers, rapists and car thieves
2. The thieving rat bastards at MCI Worldcom especially their "customer support" people
3. Venture capitalists (I miss my job you greedy pricks)
4. Bouncers
5. Short, ugly and stupid guys in Jersey City who cheat on their pregnant girlfriends with one of her short, ugly and stupid friends.
6. Everyone else

I know I forgot some people so #6 covers all the bases. While we were waiting in line, I told my friends we were complete idiots for actually waiting in line so we could pay $9 for a drink. I told Pete he was actually the lamest out of all of us, because he was waiting in line to pay $9 for a coke since he doesn't imbibe alcohol. Isn't that weird?? That I have a friend who doesn't drink?? That's like Superman having a friend who likes to wear kryptonite.

After the lounge we headed over to Chinatown for some salt and pepper squid, peking style pork chops, garlic sauteed string beans, cantonese style snails and beef lo mein. It tasted like the best food I'd ever eaten and I was sober. It was 4 in the morning though.

And speaking of child molestors (sorry for the delayed segue) they gave that guy who killed that little girl in San Diego the death penalty. My favorite quote from the article is this one from his defense attorney: "He's a good man but for one three-day weekend of terror," he said. Just like all murdering rapists are normally good people, except for the random hours of raping and murdering. I say good riddance. But I say that because I'm pretending they're actually going to fry him. They're not you know. They're going to keep him in a jail cell with unlimited books, magazines and TV for about 3 decades while they appeal, re-appeal and re-appeal his sentence. And we'll have to read about it in the papers each and every time. Yee-haw.