My People

Sometimes I Hate Some of "My" People

I just went from extreme jubilation (thinking the Eagles were going to score when Donovan McNabb avoided like 10 sacks and got off a dope pass) to extreme aggravation (The Interception). As a result, I ended up screaming at the first person who pissed me off, the Asian lady who took my food order over the phone. She had no idea where my apartment was after I gave her the cross streets, so she couldn't tell whether or not I was in her delivery area. But she said she knew for sure that I was nowhere near their delivery area. I asked her if she was sure, because I only lived 5 minutes away from her restaurant by car. So the stupid bitch starts saying that I can't just say 5 minutes I have to tell her where I live. I said I did tell her where I lived and that she didn't know where it was, but that I lived exactly 1.7 miles away from the Newport Mall and they're right across the street from it. So I ask if I can just place an order for pick-up and in mid-sentence the cunt cuts me off and says she has to answer the other phone because it's ringing. Naturally I lose my fucking mind. The crux of my annoyance is that she hasn't understood anything I've said because she doesn't speak English very well so she's trying to kick my ass off the phone. Yet she's the manager of a restaurant in the UNITED FUCKING STATES so somewhere along the line shouldn't she have taken a few fucking minutes to learn the goddamn language?? I'm sorry but bilingual blah blah this and that really fucking pisses me off. I'm all for people retaining their home languages after they come here. But ONCE THEY'RE HERE shouldn't they make some fucking effort to learn the goddamn language?? I know my opinion makes me seem like a traitor to my peoples but I don't know why it should. If I went to France for a fucking visit, not even to stay but for a fucking visit, if I ran around and forced English on people the French would refer to me as an "Ugly American." Politically correct people would shake their heads at me and call me arrogant. Yet when people come to America TO LIVE the politically correct mentality to have is that no one should be forced to learn the language. Are you fucking kidding me? If I was forced to live in fucking Kenya for the rest of my life you'd be damn certain that I would be speaking Swahili as soon as possible. I don't care if people come here and work behind closed doors or stay at home and don't bother to learn the language. But if you're going to be working in the service industry and coming into contact with people whose primary language is English EVERY FUCKING DAY then you should take an hour out of your fucking day each day to learn the fucking language. Since I'm already on the subject I might as well also say that I hate the service you get in Asian stores and restaurants. I hate it that they:

1. Don't speak the fucking language
2. Watch you like they think the moment they can't see you you're going to steal something and run
3. Roll their eyes when you ask for water then bring you a glass of tepid tap water without ice
4. Argue with you when they bring out the wrong food, like you don't know what you wanted to fucking eat. Some waiter at Hop-Kee brought out the wrong food once then told me that even though he was taking it away because I didn't want it, that he was going to charge me for it anyway. I almost shoved that plate of Cantonese-style crab right up his ass.
5. Get snotty if you ask for clean silverware, like you're just being difficult because you don't want to use the fork with the dried piece of squid on it.
6. Ignore you when you walk into their little stores until you ask them the same fucking question like 8 times.

Disclaimer: I understand that some of you politically correct people think I'm generalizing and possibly perpetuating dangerous stereotypes but here's a big FUCK YOU. I don't care. Notice I said "SOME" Asian people not "ALL." I believe that effectively excuses me from accusations of generalizing. Now I must go. The Raider game is starting and I've just achieved the perfect level of heightened adrenaline to watch it.