24: Hour Seven
1. "She's my wife. Don't you forget that." And don't YOU forget Girly Banker Boy, that Jack Bauer could kill you... with THIS. *Holding up a piece of lettuce*
2. So did Token Black Chick try to kill Head Cunt Lady's kid? She's so evil, but not in a good way (like Nina). Plus she cheated on Joey with Ross.
3. "She's breaking my heart." Oh God, shut up you pansy. No guy should ever actually utter that phrase out loud. At least not one over the age of 12.
4. "Hey what are you doing with all that computer stuff you're not supposed to be touching out?" "Nothing, just dusting it off." "Oh okay!!" It's a little unnerving that people at the Counter Terrorism Unit are so naive and trusting. Thankfully, life doesn't imitate art right? Um yeah. Right.
5. I don't understand all the poisoning and killing and burying. Doesn't that take too much effort? Wouldn't it be more efficient just to tie people up, gag them and toss them into the basement for the next 4 hours until the plan is complete?
6. When Computer Guy aka Token Black Chick's Bitch was explaining what he needed to do, Secretary Heller was thinking "Our fate is in the hands of this nervous, sweaty fat guy who looks like he masturbates eight times a day and still lives with his mother?"
7. You have to give Terrorist Mama some credit. She loves her son more than she loves terrorism. I'm sure that's rare in the terrorism world. The writers are just taking editorial liberties again.
8. And the best scene was when Terrorist Leader Guy came out of the building and all his dead minions started chanting "IM-HO-TEP!!! IM-HO-TEP!!! IM-HO-TEP!!!" Oh sorry. That wasn't Arnold Vosloo in 24. That was Arnold Vosloo in The Mummy. Always fun to see Imhotep though. Yes, I realize that I am one of exactly 12 people who actually liked The Mummy and The Mummy Returns.
9. I never thought the words "YAY!!!!!! IT'S TONY ALMEIDA!!!!!" would ever leave my mouth.
10. Kwame wants them to bring one-armed Chase back, with a hook. That would be cool wouldn't it? Then he could walk around CTU and tell jokes like "Why didn't the pirate take his kid to the new movie?" "Because it was Rated Arrrrrrggh."
11. I was in a 24 forum and some people actually wanted the writers to bring Chloe back. Are you fucking kidding me? Have we been watching the same show? Next they'll be clamoring for Kim back and I'll have to watch another season with my fingernails embedded into my hairline while screaming things like "Dammit you dumb cunt, use the gun!!!!! For the love of God USE THE GUN!!!!!"