24: Hour Seventeen

24: Hour Seventeen

Yeah I've been counting wrong, so um oh well.

Previously on 24: Audrey was annoying, we found out Michelle hooked up with some loser and they fricken shot down Air Force One, is nothing sacred on television.

1. Random Camping Couple was really frustrating, even though their reactions were probably very realistic. Except maybe the frantic kissing that kept happening while terrorists were after them. If that were me and Geo I'd be giving him a big ass push instead "RUN!!!!!!" Of course, I talk a lot of game but who knows. If some terrorist had a gun to Geo's head I'd probably crumble like a house of cards. AFTER I killed him with THIS *holding up a piece of Laffy Taffy*

2. How come they sent TWO whole people after the most important item in the wreckage? And why does Jack always carry only one gun and a handful of bullets? And why is every agent in CTU really inept except Jack? And why is Tony doing paperwork, Michelle you dumb broad.

3. How come those codes in the football can't be reset like they were in the movie Air Force One? No seriously. Don't mess with AF1 storylines and not take this movie into account. "GET OFF MY PLANE!!!"

4. Tony Tony Tony... "There's no hostility here Bill. You left your soldiers in my wife while I was rotting away in jail for saving her, but I'm over it now. No worries." I WISH HE SAID THAT! So is Bill from Division bad or what? He gives off bad vibes but maybe they're "slimy guy" vibes versus "evil guy" vibes. And why the hell does everyone at CTU give such a shit about everyone's love lives today? HELLO!!! FOCUS!!! Terrorists just shot down Air Force One you fuckers. Can we get a little keeping-your-eye-on-the-ball here, thanks.

5. How the heck did that guy become Vice President? He looks like he's about to shit in his pants at the idea of becoming President. Isn't that the whole point of why someone agrees to become Vice-President though? Because they have aspirations to one day be Commander-In-Chief? It's weird though because he seems so spineless but then he had that quick moment where he acted like a hardass and said "You went behind my back?" I foresee some very annoying storylines in the future. He seems like a tree-hugger.

6. A CTU helicopter can't shoot down two jeeps on a bridge? Jersey City thugs could shoot down two jeeps on a bridge from their apartments.

7. I love how 24 can be so formulaic sometimes. OF COURSE the cute little preppy guy whose last words were "I'm scared Dad" dies.

8. I assume the terrorists will be targeting Washington DC with their warheads? Or are they going to go all Crimson Tide on us and start a nuclear war in our name. Oh, the suspense. It doesn't matter. Jack will save the day. My faith is a tad shaken thanks to the whole Air Force One fiasco but he'll still come through in the end. He has to, because in Season Five he has to save us from the North Koreans. I mean yes, Arabs of course work best as the perennial bad guys but we should change it up again and nominate the North Koreans for that role next season.