February 9, 2007

I'm An Idiot, Verified

I'm An Idiot, Verified
(With a Monday edit at the bottom of the post)

See these fools jumping into the freezing ocean in the middle of February?

"What the hell was I thinking???"

Yeah, that's going to be me. I'm still not clear on the details but I believe I somehow allowed myself to be goaded into doing the New Jersey Polar Bear Plunge by Paul. I naturally responded by begging some of my friends to do it with us, but so far the only people who have stepped up to the plate are Steve and my girl Heide from the Chaos Radio Show. Geo said he'd do it if Paul flaked and I was already committed, but has since breathed a heartfelt sigh of relief that I won't be playing the You're My Husband Card and manipulating him into what can only be described as an act of lunacy.

There will be pictures involved, and apparently we are not allowed to dive in fully clothed, because I was tempted to do it in a puffy white faux fur jacket, for shits and giggles. With a fish in my mouth. You know, like an actual polar bear.

So to further complicate matters (as in the matter of "I can't fucking believe I agreed to do this, why does my common sense go on hiatus so often) Paul and I have a bet going on who can raise the most money. For the sake of argument, our own starting donations don't count towards the final tally. The challenge loss has yet to be determined, but I refuse to contemplate the idea of losing. I did in fact choose to play the Husband Card, by informing Geo that if I am behind in the tally, I will be in the beach parking lot giving out handjobs, and naturally as my husband he would be expected to join me. Being that he has hands. An unnamed friend has pledged a certain amount of money, if I can jump into the water without cursing, which he doesn't think I have a chance of doing. Oh ye of little faith. I will go into the water without cursing, even if I have to duct tape my mouth shut to do it.

Anyway, if you love me at all...

Donate here.

Yes, I played the If You Love Me Card. And it has been awhile since I hit my friends up for donations. Even 5 bucks goes a long way and it's for a good cause, namely the Special Olympics of New Jersey AND the "We Don't Want Riss To Be Subjected To Paul Rubbing It In For The Rest Of Ever That He Raised More Money Than Her Fund."

"Always do sober, what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut." -- Ernest Hemingway

Monday edit: - SPECIAL THANKS TO:

ANT (I miss you dude)
COLEEN (Hey I still have your card, I'll mail it again in its original envelope as proof it got sent back to me)
LANI (congrats on winning the contest mama)
MAZ (Thanks for donating despite the fact that 5 dollars is like 6,747,387 ozdollars)
TONY (Are you sure you don't want to come in, the water is lovely)
KWAME (holy crap holy crap holy crap your big day is right around the corner)
RAY and MATT (Hope those livers are training for life in New York, like Rocky before he went up against Ivan Drago).

YOU GUYS ROCK!! (And for the Aussies, ONYA!!!!)

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