April 24, 2007

24 Season Six: Hour Nineteen

24 Season Six: Hour Nineteen

1. Every time they show a close-up of Agent Ricky I vow to moisturize properly and stay out of the sun. Also, I sing "Here we are, face to face, a couple of silver spoons."

2. Even television presidents should learn from our country's history. Every President after Clinton should know that the Oval Office is not the place to get your Presidential Staff lubed up, otherwise it would be called the Oral Office. You're the President for God's sake, do what JFK did and sneak into hotel rooms. That's what the Secret Service is for. To take bullets for you and supply you with random hoes.

3. Men should never fight with women. It's not as if they can legally hit them, so it tends to be a war of words. Chloe went for the jugular with "How about you NOT arm nuclear bombs for terrorists?" Shame shame Chloe. You just don't go there, regardless of how pissed off you are. Other examples of shit that's off-limits in a fight are "That's why you're impotent" or "That's why I banged your brother" or "How about you NOT accidentally run a red and kill people." Some women will go there though, and happily.

4. Why do people at CTU always put in for transfers during a crisis? There are nuclear blah blahs floating around out there. Surely your pity party tantrum can wait a few more hours.

5. Karen Hayes throwing her husband Bill Buchanan to the wolves is about as surprising as there being another "mole" at CTU/Division/The White House. Firing him then saying "We will get through this, that's all that matters" and him responding "Is it?" then hanging up on her was priceless. Thatta boy Bill. I got that feeling I always get when one of my boys finally dumps his triflin' girl.

6. At least Shiny Hair Nadia is doing something now. I like how she has spent eighteen hours kissing ass, filing her nails, brushing her hair and delivering messages to the people who actually work but she was named Acting Director of the Counter-Terrorist Unit. It brings a much-needed dose of reality to the show. Seriously, how many times has that happened at your job? If it hasn't happened to you at least twice then stay there forever.

7. I am going straight to hell, and I know this because while Jack was Oh-My-Goding over twitchy ass Audrey, I was laughing my ass off. She looked like Smoky in Friday when Hector sold him crack-dusted weed and he ended up in the chicken coop.

Kwame's Thoughts

1. "Jack Bauer has gone rogue." Great way to start an episode. Nothing is better than when Jack goes "rogue." The quality of the show jumps by about 50 percent. By the way, at first I accidentally wrote "Jack Bauer has gone rouge" hahaha...)

2. There are things you can say in anger and take back, but "In the future don't arm nuclear bombs for terrorists" is not one of them. That was really below the belt Chloe.

3. If President Logan and the First Lady making out last season was a 100 on the "I'm going to throw up now" scale, the VP/Acting President and Skinny Blond Chick making out is at least a 90. And we all know she's only giving up the goods because she's some sort of mole/spy.

4. The "Doyle" character wouldn't be that bad if it was a different actor. He's by far the smartest "other field agent" they've had at CTU. Ricky Schroeder just doesn't quite pull it off. They should have made Chase (of the hacked off arm fame) more like Doyle. Without the baby mama drama of course.

5. With every episode I become a bigger Tom Lennox fan. (Ed's note: Seriously, they need to keep him on the show forever.)

6. I love how Jack knows the location of a random abandoned hotel. I think he and Audrey used to roleplay "field ops" there.

7. I knew he wasn't going to die, but the message Jack left for Bill got to me a little. Parenthood turns you into such a wuss.

8. It sucks that Bill Buchanan had to take the fall. He's the best director CTU has ever had. He has that weird "dad vibe" where you never want to let him down. Well at least we don't have to root for Karen now.

9. My wife said I'm "wrong" because I giggled a little at twitchy Audrey (Ed's note: At least I'll have good company in the handbasket.)

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