Weekend Roundup

Weekend Roundup

I actually did a lot this weekend which is bizarre considering my normal weekend itinerary consists of reading, sleeping, riding my exercise bike and watching Justice League. Speaking of which, let me take this moment to digress and say that Justice League was awesome on Saturday. It was the second part of the one where they meet the Justice Guild and the episode was done in memory of Gardner Fox, who authored the original Justice League of America comics. Unbelievable. You know, this cartoon never fails to impress me everytime I watch it. The art is amazing and the storylines always combine an interesting plot with touches of humanity. Okay back to my weekend.

On Friday Geo and I went to some random "club" in Plainfield, New Jersey. I say "club" because in Plainfield, any place possessing more than three bottles of liquor is considered a club. So we went to this place to see my friends play again. On the way we got lost because when we got to the address provided by the Love Lies Bleeding website, we were parked in front of a little white house next to a swingset being used as a clothesline. Yes, there were appliances on the porch. So I call the "club" and it turns out we're at "116 Watchung Avenue in Watchung" but we need to drive "a quarter of a mile north" so that we'll be at "116 Watchung Avenue in Plainfield" which is the next town over apparently. Sometimes I really hate New Jersey. Is the idea of NOT repeating address numbers on the same street within five miles of each other really THAT complicated???

On Saturday night we picked up Lani and went to some bar in Alphabet City to see the guys downstairs play. Their band is named "Spoonfed" after our friend Spoon who actually plays for a different band. Lani and I thought that was cute but Spoon said "Steve named it that just to bug me I think." So now it's cute and funny as hell because that sounds like something Steve would do. The guys rocked as usual, although I really wish they would play more alternative and hip-hop. They ended with their one cover song, "In The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World which they know I love. Lani had the first drink in its entirety (meaning not just one sip every 8 months or so) of her life. She was disappointed because she wasn't affected by it so I suggested doing a power hour of tequila but for some reason she wasn't buying into that.

On Sunday, Spoon came by the apartment around noon and somewhere in the course of the conversation I started pouring Malibu and cokes so by mid-afternoon I was feeling pretty nice. We decided to head out to "El Rio" on the East Side to celebrate Cinco De Mayo at a pseudo-Mexican restaurant. I say "pseudo" because everyone from California knows you can't find decent Mexican food in New York. It's beyond an improbability, it's an impossibility. So we have a few more drinks and some blah Mexican food but we HOUSED the chips and salsa. It wasn't even that good but we ate it like it was manna raining down from Heaven... during a famine, in a drought, after our jaws had been wired shut for three weeks. After dinner...supper? It was too early for dinner and too late for lunch when we ate. Semantics.

After the meal we wandered over to the bar to hang out. Big mistake. Spoon's college friends were cool but the rest of the crowd in this bar were so... I can't even think of a word appropriate to describe them. Is it just me or is the East Side above the 20s really, really lame?? "Something tells me we're not in Kansas anymore." It wasn't that the people on the East Side are nerdy, it just looks like they're trying too hard. Like you'd see women wearing midriff tops with unfashionable pants and know that they didn't really want to put that on, their friends just told them they needed to hooch up their outfit. So they took off the "J Crew Stretch-T" and put on the midriff their friends convinced them to buy off the clearance rack at Express last September.

The guys at this place were even worse. Half of them were part of the "peripheral bar crew" which means they don't exactly work at the place as a bouncer but one of their friends does so they have to dress like him. As part of the "peripheral bar crew" you get free drinks from the bartender your friend is nailing but you look like an idiot because you're wearing a cheap suit at a bar on a Sunday afternoon. The absolute funniest thing you will ever see at a bar on the East Side are those white girls that watch too many Puffy videos and loudly act as if they have "flava." FUCKING HYSTERICAL. This one white chick yesterday kept going "HOLLA!!!" and Lani and I could not stop laughing. Now you all know I'm not saying white people can't have flava (it's called "vanilla" just kidding) because Eminem is living, breathing proof that they can. But this chick at the bar was hysterical. I mean seriously... unless you're Lil Bow Wow, being able to say the words "My trust fund" automatically nullifies any "flava" you might ever have.

We capped the night off by going to see Spiderman which on the left coast was "HELLA GOOD" and on the east coast was "OFF THE HOOK!!!" Everyone should go see it. I myself may see it again sometime in the next few days. Three things about Spiderman:

1. The casting was bad ass. Tobey Maguire is the perfect Peter Parker, Willem Dafoe (as usual) is the villain you kind of like and is it just me or is James Franco really fucking hot?? I can't believe he wasn't on my Men's Final Four. We're going to have to revisit that post.
2. For a comic to movie adaption, this is almost about as good as it gets. X-Men was a disgrace. The only two people on there who were cast well were Hugh Jackman as Wolverine and Patrick Stewart as Professor Xavier. I don't remember Cyclops being a dork in the comic like he was in the movie. And don't even talk to me about what they did with Storm. I realize that when casting directors think "I need a black actress" the only one they ever come up with is Halle Berry because she's half-white but HOW COULD YOU FUCK UP STORM AND LIVE WITH YOUR SELVES??? Sacrilege. And Magneto was a force to be reckoned with in the comic. In the movie you felt like giving him some Geritol and helping him cross the street.
3. If I could have changed one thing about Spiderman I would have put less sentimental stuff and more action. But I'll take what I can get. I give it "5 snaps in Z formation"...can't wait for the next one. Bring on Episode 2!!!

P.S. - They showed a trailer for "The Sum Of All Fears" and I STILL can't get over the fact that Ben Affleck will be playing Jack Ryan instead of Harrison Ford. Ben Affleck is NOT a Jack Ryan. How could they fuck with one of the best characters in fiction this way??? Isn't there a law of some sort??