June 10, 2002

MTV Movie Awards

MTV Movie Awards

I'm watching the MTV Movie Awards waiting for Eminem's performance. Okay he's onstage now and bad ass as usual. God I love that guy. I'm actually hooked on the show now because Will Farrell from SNL is on. This skit based on that Jodie Foster movie Panic Room is corny yet amusing. Hey....Orlando Bloom just won the "Best Breakthrough Male" popcorn thing for his role as Legolas in Lord of the Rings. Hooray!!!! He was the best part of that movie. Like I said right after I saw it, during the movie Geo turns to me when they first showed Legolas and says "Now you know that's a bad ass motherfucker. He only carries a bow and arrows." Moving right along after I wipe away my drool... Kelly Osbourne is performing her rendition of "Papa Don't Preach" right now and her brother is running up to home-video it. Okay that wasn't staged. Sharon Osbourne is awesome. I guess you'd have to be that centered to be married to Ozzie and parent those two though. Despite the "disfunctionality" that family is pretty cool because you can tell they all love each other despite the bickering. Sharon and the kids were on Howard once and he kept asking her about her alleged relationship with Jay Leno. The kids were like "Cut it out Howard, you're going to be responsible for out parents' divorce" and they sounded seriously irked. Anyway I think "disfunctional family" is such a "buzz" phrase (for lack of a better description, since "buzz" is a buzz word too). Whose family isn't disfunctional in today's times? I think families that seem functional are the ones you have to watch out for.

Ewan McGregor is kind of a hottie. I never noticed that before. I dig the red hair. Hey he was the presenter for an award won by Nicole Kidman for Moulin Rouge... a movie he starred in as well. It must be a conspiracy!! Because you know the movie industry cares so much about the MTV Movie Awards that they would rig the fan voting. No matter what bullshit they spout up there you know the only people that really care about receiving the award are people that are so new their only famous roles are non-Academy-Award-nomination-inspiring ones (like Legolas... and he wasn't even at the awards). Actually, I think MTV rigs it so that whoever shows up wins. Reese Witherspoon beat out my girl Angelina Jolie for "Breakthrough Female Performance"?? Or whatever the hell that shit was called. Oh well I can't really gripe. I thought Reese was great in Legally Blonde and I was ambivalent to her prior to seeing the movie. Afterwards I ended up liking her. Besides, everyone I know with the exception of myself hated Tomb Raider. I liked it. So there.

Bailey
I went to 3 animal shelters in New Jersey and couldn't find a dog I could bring home. I found a whole bunch I wanted, but none I could bring home. Mike was right about adopting a dog from a shelter. There's no such thing as going in there and not finding a dog you want. If you like dogs at all you'll see a bunch at every shelter you go to that you want to take. It's a combination of liking dogs in general and knowing that if no one adopts them and the shelter gets crowded, they'll have to be "put down." I hate that phrase. They kill them because there's no room for them anymore. No need to sugar-coat shit. Don't mean to sound like one of those people that values all canine life over human life but I must say I find it difficult to stomach that innocent dogs are killed all the time (their only crimes are being born to families that weren't responsible enough to neuter/spay or keep an eye on their pets) but we as a society find it distasteful to execute murderous criminals. I wish I was the sovereign ruler of a country and had absolute power.

Secretary of the Interior:"Your Majesty, we don't have enough room for all these abandoned dogs."
Queen Riss: "Execute everyone in the maximum-security prison and turn it into another pound."

Okay I'm kidding. Kind of.

My point is I couldn't take home any of the dogs I saw (including this beautiful Rottweiler-German Shepard mix with big beautiful hazel eyes) because they were all too big for my apartment. So Lani suggested we go to a Manhattan shelter because a lot of people in Manhattan give up apartment-sized dogs. So we went to one on 110th street and three seconds after I walked in to look at the animals, a guy walked up to me and said "How would you like a beagle baby?" And I got all happy and one minute later I was standing in front of a 7-month old beagle-mix puppy and I fell in love.

He looks just like me and Lani's dog Nookie. I introduced them to each other briefly on Saturday. Nookie growled at him haha, he's mad territorial as are most dogs. Bailey's face is wider though and his body is black but his paws are brown and white sprinkly. He looks like a combination of a beagle, Jack Russell terrier and a springer spaniel (because of his feet). Who knows though. His owner gave him up because "he barks too much" but we haven't noticed that he's like that at all. We'll have to see how he is after he becomes acclimated to his new environment. I spoke to Wes "The Beagle Expert" at the shelter for like an hour and he gave me some pretty good training tips but I'm still going to put him into an obedience school. I think Bailey's previous owner just left him alone all the time and let him piss and crap everywhere then yelled at him. He doesn't know yet how to go outside. Geo took him on a half-hour walk and the moment they came back he took a crap on the hardwood floor behind the couch. He's learning though and we praise the hell out of him everytime he "eliminates" outside. Doesn't the use of that word crack you up? It's all over the dog care pamphlets we got. Okay I have to go to the pet store and the vet right now. I'll post my Game 3 notes when I get back...