Shits n' Giggles and The Worst Movie EVER

Shits n' Giggles and The Worst Movie EVER

I haven't posted a conversation with Geo in awhile. Lucky for you all, we had a funny one today. So Geo walks into the house laughing his ass off. I ask him what's so amusing.

Geo: I was driving down the street and saw some girl I used to mess with.
Me: Which one?
Geo: Remember the one I told you about, that wanted me to drive up to Boston, pick her ass up, drive her down to Jersey so she could hang out with her friends, then drive her ass back up to Boston?
Me: Hahahaha what'd you say again?
Geo: I told her she was trippin, and that she needed to think about who I was.
Me: Meaning?
Geo: Meaning I wasn't her boyfriend or some shit like that, who was she to be asking ME to do that for her. Yeah right I'd do that.
Me: Yeah let me just go gas up the car. I mean I'd understand if she wanted to hang out with you and all, but don't be afraid to ask someone to pick you up so you can chill with other people.
Geo: Like I'd do it even if she was going to chill with me. How much driving is that for some random girl.
Me: I was going to say, one of my exes picked me up from Santa Cruz once and drove me back down to L.A. the same night, that's 13 hours round trip. After he worked all day. Come to think of it, I don't know how he did it.
Geo: Well he was your boyfriend. I never spoke to her after that. I was like she's crazy. She'd call and I'd tell them to say I wasn't home.
Me: Hahaha you mean she still tried to talk to you after that?
Geo: You know?!?!?
Me: So why were you laughing when you came home?
Geo (laughing again): Oh cuz I saw her ass was waiting at the bus stop.
Me: Hey what's wrong with taking the bus! I commuted into the city for 4 years.
Geo: No it's not that, she's just Miss "My parents are so rich" and there she is taking the bus. She saw me and I straight out laughed at her and kept driving.
Me: You are not right. But yeah that is funny as hell.

Moving right along, Geo and I now have the inauspicious pleasure of being able to say that we saw the WORST movie in the history of film. We popped in Net's copy of The Cat In The Hat, figuring it would be like The Grinch. About ten minutes into the movie I was like "Am I the only one who's noticed that this movie is awful?" But Geo turned to me with a rather pained expression so then I knew I wasn't the only one who'd noticed it. It really is a horrible, horrible movie. And it's full of all sorts of (to quote the DVD cover) "crude humor and double entendres." WTF??? What the hell is Dreamworks doing putting crude jokes and innuendos in a movie targeting kids? Yeah I know I totally sound like a parent right now but it really is a question that should be asked.

This isn't like anime or violent cartoons like South Park that you know are geared towards adults because they air past 10 pm. This is a mainstream movie that you know kids wanted to see especially after they picked up their McDonald's Happy Meal Cat In The Hat toys and ate their marshmallow-filled Cat In The Hat cereal. The worst part is the "crude humor" wasn't even witty nor amusing. So they did something stupid for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Such abject stupidity is annoying. What a potentially nice conversation to have with you four-year-old son. "Mom, what was the Cat really going to say?" "He was going to say "balls" dear. If you want to use it just say "Damn, my balls are sweaty as hell."