Random Thoughts Volume 45734865876

Random Thoughts Volume 45734865876

1. I like to buy journals, but not write in them. Why is that? I have like 20 journals that only have one or two pages written on, which I wrote out of obligation. How frivolous is it to purchase journals you know you have no intention of using?

2. At the mall today I realized there are an inordinate amount of fat people in Jersey City who like to wear really tight clothes.

3. At the mall today I also realized that there are an inordinate amount of people in Jersey City who aren't old enough to drive, but have kids.

4. Why are children's clothes so expensive? My girls are like 1/6th my size. So shouldn't their clothes cost 1/6th the price of mine?
Kat came over yesterday and dropped off some gifts for the girls. Woo-hoo! Kat rocks.

5. This "metrosexual" thing is out of control. Men should not wear pink. Period.

6. Okay the movie Honey got trashed by every movie critic and their mother, but I thought it was cute. Then again movie critics are pedantic fucks anyway. Heaven forbid they like a movie that doesn't depict the agonies of human existence, in Swahili with English subtitles. I however, am a big fan of movies that one can enjoy while reading a book and talking on the phone. Preferably ones filled with superheroes or ninjas that can kill people with their eyelashes. I don't need a realistic, thought-provoking, propaganda-filled movie to reaffirm my own intelligence. I like watching people do stuff I can't do. Like Honey.

7. There are people who can dance and there are dancers. I can do some dance moves but it takes me awhile to learn. Dancers however, just watch something once or twice and can imitate it perfectly. Their rhythm is flawless, and the motion of their bodies is perfectly fluid, almost like they're a part of the atmosphere itself. Watching them is a joy, because movement is so natural to them. Geo is like that, so is my friend Kuen. Even when they're making fun of something it looks good, like their bodies are incapable of moving poorly when there's good music on. Geo has offered to learn the last dance sequence in Honey for me, because he knows I'm sad I didn't get to see too many of his old school breakdancing days.

8. Geo does everything well. Kwame thinks he's a cyborg. I'd be inclined to agree if it wasn't for the fact that he fathered my children. But if it wasn't for that small fact I would still be suspiciously poking him in his sleep.

9. We saw a car today that had a big old design thing on the side. I think it was supposed to be a skull but it looked like an amoeba. It was hideous. Why do some people do that. "You know what would look really good on my car? Protozoa."

10. Trips to the mall are no longer fun for me. When I was single and making a nice tidy sum, I wouldn't think twice about dropping a few hundred on a Prada bag. Okay so I'd think twice and maybe thrice but still end up buying the $500 bag anyway. Now that I have kids I'm like "WHAT?!?!?!?! 30 dollars for a shirt??? Is it a MAGIC shirt?? Will everything I touch turn to gold when I wear it???" It's not that I'm cheap now. It's that I was stupid then. And I still find myself checking out designer things I wouldn't mind owning some day, when money is a less of an object.

11. People need to stop telling me scary stories, because I'm tired of peeking around corners and frantically trying to discern shapes in the dark.

12. Why do some people freak out over the possibility that their "right to privacy as guaranteed by the Constitution" may be slightly infringed upon but want to repeal the right to bear arms? I mean technically, the Constitution doesn't mention privacy, the Supreme Court decided that the Bill of Rights was to be interpreted that way. But you can't say that we need to take special care respecting privacy because it is a Constitutional right in one breath, then in the next breath say people shouldn't be allowed to bear arms, something that is undisputably a Constitutional right. Support the issue of privacy because you feel it is the right thing to do, not because it's a Constitutional right. Then you can run around and bitch about the NRA without contradicting yourself. We really should ban handguns though. Because you know all those drug dealers and gangbangers out there who are the ones killing everyone? They have their weapons legally. Permits, licenses, everything. So changing the law will force them to turn in their guns. Yay! No more crime.

13. I have a zit up inside my nose. This ranks up there on the "Most Annoying, Non-Serious Things That Can Happen To Your Body List." Other things that made the list:

-Paper cuts, especially ones from card stock
-Ingrown nails
-Hangnails
-Zits on your back
-Styes or "pinkeye"
-Blisters, although the ones filled with water are kinda cool until you drain them
-Splinters
-When you get a rash because your dirty ass dog came up and rubbed his head on your arm before you could turn away.

14. Aud and I were reminiscing today about this time we both got high and ended up being a little mean to some person we'd just met. It wasn't that we were deliberately trying to be witches, it's that weed is not unlike liquor in the sense that it effectively removes that filter everyone has, which tells them what's appropriate to say and what isn't. In retrospect I was feeling a tad bit guilty. Aud wasn't. Aud is a sociopath.

15. Geo and I watched Kill Bill Vol. 1 a couple nights ago. The fighting sequences were awesome but there was just a little too much unnecessary violence for me. What????? Did I just type that? Oh God, I AM a parent now. In all seriousness though, it's not really that. It's that as much as I love action/martial arts flicks, I've always been a bit squeamish and the entire movie is like the first 5 minutes of Saving Private Ryan times a million.

16. It was a pretty cool surprise that I went from using something like 98% of my 6MB Yahoo inbox to using 3% 0f my 100MB Yahoo inbox. I was getting tired of deleting shit just to send an email. Okay that's not true, what I was getting tired of was people bitching that their emails to me were getting bounced back. So pick up the damn phone!!

17. I just read Ender's Shadow which is the parallel book to Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card. It was a pretty good read. I'd only read parallel books once before, two romance novels about twins in 19th century America, so it really doesn't count. I recommended Card's books to one of my friends and he said he doesn't read. Okay people who don't read scare me more than rats, but not more than... okay I don't want to talk about it. Let's talk about something else. It's 3 o'clock in the morning for God's sake.

18. I could probably continue this list until past 100 tonight, but I'm getting sleepy. And I'm not certain who would keep reading once I started discussing books, even if it was science fiction books. I'll go to 20. Speaking of books, Book Two in Jonathan Stroud's Bartimaeus Trilogy is coming out in August, and J.K. Rowling announced that Book Six in the Harry Potter series will be called Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. Woo-hooo!!!

19. Would you guys think I was totally gay if I named my next kid "Ender" like in the book? Yes, I know he'd be traumatized for awhile. But if he inherits his mother's love of reading, he'll think it was pretty cool that he was named after a fictional child prodigy who commanded the Earth's forces in a war against aliens. Then again if he inherits his father's reluctance to read, he just might despise me for the rest of his life. Okay never mind. I still think it'd be pretty cool though. You won't see that name on a license plate at the toy store.

20. It's not so easy killing bugs in the dark. Sorry, this is pretty lame as far as conclusions go, but I'm tired. And I have to (in honor of Mike's birthday I'll use "his" word) TINKLE. Okay I have to say something else now, I can't let the last word of this post be "tinkle." Who made up that saying anyway. Did they mean to say "tingle" like how it tingles when you hold your pee for an excruciatingly long time and then finally get to a bathroom? Or did they mean to say "twinkle" like how... like how... Forget it. I can't even reach for this one.