A Demented Fairy Tale (Part Two)

A Demented Fairy Tale (Part Two)

Ten minutes later, the unlikely pair was on their way. The entrance to the Enchanted Forest was located on the other side of the village. As they walked through the town, they passed the saloon where Bo Peep served drinks and other refreshments on the side. Preoccupied by the sight of a big fat egg with feet, sitting precariously on the edge of the town wall, Cinderella stepped in something slippery.

"Dammit," she muttered, bending down to examine her shoe.
"Sorry," squeaked a little voice from her right. A small rabbit was standing there, a faint blush tingeing his furry white cheeks. "Bambi was hogging the outhouse and the nearest tree was too far away." He took the lettuce he'd been eating and began wiping at her heel. She looked around and realized there had to be a hundred or so random animals lounging around outside the saloon.
"What are you all waiting for?" she asked.
"The Pied Piper is getting his pipe cleaned, if you know what I mean." The rabbit smirked. "We don't know where to go without him."

Cinderella laughed. The door opened and "Little" Bo Peep walked out, followed by an exhausted-looking man clutching a wooden flute. Bo may have been little when she was younger, but as with many women, her metabolism caught up with her once she hit her mid-twenties. All those mugs of ale didn't help either. The calories she worked off making her living, were packed back on the moment she came back downstairs and downed a few more brewskies. Or ten.

"Hey cuz, finally took my advice and picked yourself up a man I see." Bo glanced at Prince Dimwit appraisingly, who didn't notice because he was busy tying his shoelaces and muttering "one loop, two loops, through the loop and pull" to himself. Cinderella shook her head in disgust.
"No way. I'm just his guide. Have at it if you want, but I must warn you. I think he has a major Oedipal complex."
Bo Peep looked disappointed. "Never mind then. What brings you my way?"
"I need the money I lent you," Cinderella explained.
"I don't have it yet, I took an I.O.U. from the guy with the pipe," Bo said.
"What? Why" Cinderella asked in bewilderment.
"Because he had quite a pipe on him." Bo laughed at her own joke. She turned to look at Prince Dimwit. "Hey sugar, you got any money on you?"
The Prince pulled out a velvet bag with "Allowance" stitched on the side in gold thread. Cinderella shook her head. "No don't get it from him, get it from someone else. We're going to need his money too."

Bo looked around for any prospective clients in the vicinity. Spying the fat egg guy on the wall, Bo tugged down the neckline of her low-cut dress, pushed up her considerable bosoms and headed over to him. "Well hello there sexy" she purred.
Big Egg Guy's eyes bugged out and he jumped in shock. Losing his balance completely, he toppled off the wall and hit the ground with a sickening crack. Bo checked for a pulse and finding none, shrugged then began to comb through his pockets. She sauntered back to Cinderella and handed her some coins. "Don't assess a late fee okay," she quipped. "I'm fresh out of people to accidentally kill."

Cinderella stared at the coins in her hand and looked back up at her cousin. "You really are a sociopath, you know that?"

"Yes. But don't tell the men. They really fall for the sweet and innocent crap." Bo blew her cousin a kiss and sauntered back into the saloon.
"She's really nice." Prince Dimwit said. Cinderella rolled her eyes. The little white rabbit tugged at the hem of her dress.
"Can I come with you?" he asked.
"Sure," Cinderella replied. "But if we run out of food, I know for a fact you'd taste good sauteed in wine sauce with minced garlic. I think I ate your brother once."
"Really??" the rabbit squealed in fright.
"No, not really," Cinderella sighed. "I'm a vegetarian."
"Really???"
"Yes, if vegetables have four legs and bleed. Let's bounce."

She turned and headed towards the entrance to the forest. Prince Dimwit and the rabbit watched for a moment, then followed her.