More Stuff

More Stuff

About 8,372 people sent this to me via IM or e-mail. For the eight or so of you left out there who haven't seen it, here is actual proof that Asian people are nuts. You need sound to get the full experience, otherwise it's just weird. I love those guys though. I want to invite them over for karaoke and crack. If they can do that to "I Want It That Way" think of what they could do to "I'll Make Love To You" by Boyz II Men or "All My Life"by K-Ci and Jo Jo. I wonder if they take requests.

I think if you videotape me and Janelle when we get wasted and decide to karaoke at 3 in the morning to "Heart of Glass" by Blondie... it kind of looks like that. Except I start randomly shedding clothes because it gets hot from all the jumping around and throwing hair. Wait I'm confused, which night am I talking about. Oh yeah, karaoke.

The kiddos made me a bit nervous this morning. They wake up every morning and talk to each other in that weird twin language they have, that no one understands. But this time they were talking about ME. They would say some long sentence and in there would be one recognizable word, "Mama." Then they would point at me and laugh. What could they have been saying? "Mama looks funny when she drools in her sleep huh?" Or maybe "Look at Mama sleep with her mouth open, she's such a barbarian." I don't know but I woke up in a hurry.

Last night Mike J and I hit up our (my) favorite Indian food restaurant, then the little pub we park by and hit up sometimes. We weren't planning on playing any pool, so we stayed in the bar section of the joint by the door. Which turned out to be a mistake. Apparently, the cooler kids usually hang out by the pool table. The section we were in is reserved for drunk people who want to make out on a barstool in a fairly bright bar, or drunken older men who leer at the bartender and make high-pitched "YIIIIIIIP" noises every two minutes. Oh and who ask questions like...

Guy: Where are you from?
Me: Umm... Jersey City?
Guy: No, where are you from like where did you grow up?
Me: California.
Guy: No like where are you FROM, what's your nationality.
Me: Well, I was born here, so my nationality is American. But my ethnicity is Chinese-Filipino.

He let it go after that, which I was glad for. I dislike having to explain to people that China and the Philippines are actually two completely different countries.

I just received the funniest personal letter in the history of letters. It's from some guy named Brad, responding to a letter from his girlfriend Elizabeth. She wanted to apologize for sucking off some other guy in a public restroom, while Brad waited at the bar. Hee. I just skimmed over Elizabeth's letter, it was pretty boring. She lost me somewhere at "The world looks different today..." But Brad's response is classic. I don't know who Brad is but we should be best friends. The long-division line had me crying. And Elizabeth deserves to be dumped, but not because she blew some stranger in a restroom. I just can't stand it when people randomly capitalize words in the middle of a sentence. It's as bad as not capitalizing "i" like "i am a pretentious fuck who thinks i am sticking it to the man somehow by not capitalizing i."

Have a great weekend everyone, don't forget to dress up for Halloween!! Then, you can come to my house, where I will be waiting on the roof with a slingshot and stale candy.