I Like Big Butts And I Cannot Lie (Again)

I Like Big Butts And I Cannot Lie (Again)
(My goal is to have as many posts titled this as possible.)

By the way, the rock cover of "Baby Got Back" i.e. ("I like big butts and I cannot lie") is sung by The Grand Skeem. There's also a few others out there but this is the best one.

The iPod I inherited recently from Mike has motivated me to listen to more varied tunes. Not all of them good. I have an entirely new set of crappy yet almost likeable songs in my possession now, that are EVEN WORSE. Move over Britney and Mariah, now there's something meatier. But we won't talk about that.

Okay fine, here it is:

9 More Crappy Songs I Admit To Liking
(My first List of Crappy Songs I Like)

1. I Touch Myself (The Divinyls) - This is like the masturbation anthem. As a proponent of masturbation it would be hypocritical for me to dislike this song.
2. The Boy Is Mine (Brandy and Monica) - I need help.
3. Sally That Girl (2 Live Crew) - This song doesn't even have a melody or a groove of some sort. The entire thing is done in a monotone. It's like Ben Stein rapping.
4. Ill Na Na (Foxy Brown) - Sure she's a total skank but Methodman is in it.
5. Boom Boom Boom Boom (The Venga Boys) - As a proponent of sex it would also be hypocritical for me to dislike this song and the next one.
6. Obsession (Animotion) - What song is that, you ask. It's that one 80's song that goes "You're my obsession, who do you want me to be, to make you sleep with me."
7. The Sign (Ace of Base) - I KNOW, I KNOW!!! I'm like three Krispy Kremes short of a dozen.
8. Skater Boy (Avril Lavigne) - Steve, don't get too wet over this.
9. Baby Got Back (Sir Mix-A-Lot)

Okay that's enough for one day, I'm not sado-masochistic. I know what you all are thinking. Take those songs and add them to the 18 shitty ones I already admitted to and there seems to be no room for decent music in my tastes. Bite me.

Moving right along... One of my 2-year-old daughters walked over to me the other day and said "Mani, sa na no. Sa na no" while pointing at the television. Incidentally, Geo tried to get the girls to switch from "Mama" to "Mommy" and thus "Mani" was born. Anyway, she just kept repeating it and I had no idea what she was saying. Geo figured it out first. My little girl was singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" and trying to tell me to put Eurotrip on. I really should be embarrassed that my two-year-old daughter is singing a song that begins "Scotty doesn't know that Fiona and me do it in my van every Sunday." But I'm not because I'm too busy thinking it's funny. Which will end the moment she can actually articulate the lyrics. Oh well.

I should probably teach them how to sing the new Pink song "Stupid Girls."

Me, Geo and Mike used to go see this Jersey cover band all the time called Love Lies Bleeding. Saw them at least a hundred times before they broke up, they were that good. The frontman and guitarist/keyboardist is now in a band called Lifespeed. Their bassist was in a band called The Majestic and their lead guitarist went touring with some band. I had no idea what happened to their drummer John, so I consulted the almighty Google oracle. Turns out he joined some group called The Grand Skeem, which released an album containing a cover of Sir Mix-A-Lot's "Baby Got Back." It's pretty good. And so I started digging around and now I have a whole host of rock-punk-ska covers. Not much into ska but I like ska covers for some reason.

My point is I like big butts and I cannot lie. Which is even more fun when it's followed by a guitar riff.

6 Songs I Would Sing If I Got Thrown Onstage By Burly Henchmen
1. "I Want You To Want Me" by Cheap Trick
2. "Lost in Emotion" by Lisa Lisa and The Cult Jam
3. "#1 Crush" by Garbage
4. "Feed the Tree" by Belly (You rock if you know what this song is)
5. "Bohemian Rhapsody" (The Lauryn Hill version not the Queen one. Though that would be amusing.)
6. "Kailanman" by Jocelyn Enriquez (The song is entirely in Tagalog, I think it would be neat to sing a song no one in the crowd will understand.)

Thanks to Paul, I'm also starting to get into Death Cab For Cutie. I'm not saying I want to sleep in line for concert tickets or anything but if they fell into my lap I'd go. They're listed as some random thing called "art rock" but sound like new wave. Guess you can't call recent new wave "new wave" because it's confusing. So they call it "art rock." Which brings to mind people singing and playing their guitars, while painting. A canvas, not a house. My point is, I can't believe you all are still reading this. Slow day at work huh.