Happy 30th Birthday to one of my bestest friends:
In honor of which, I must list the Official Riss and Abel Friendship Timeline.
May 1994 - Two 18-year-olds meet in the IRC #filipino chatroom when one of them gets bored and starts spamming the channel by typing out the lyrics to a Das Efx song (that would be me.)
July 1995 - Abel spends my birthday with me, standing at a payphone near his house, where some crackho offers to suck his dick for a cigarette while he's on the phone.
August 1995 - Abel is the sole winner of a high-stakes Strip Pusoy game, leaving me, Christine and Oliver no choice but to dive butt naked into Prency's apartment complex's pool in Los Angeles.
September 1995 - Me, Abel, T, Aud and Dean get drunk or high or both and chase rats on the Jersey City piers. Or rather, Dean chases rats while the rest of us stand on higher ground. Two days later, me, Tony and Abel are on our way home from a party, with all the windows rolled up. I begin to feel the gaseous effects of consuming corned beef. Noticing that Abel keeps giving Tony increasingly dirty looks, I stifle my giggles and continue my silent but deadly assault. Until Abel looks like he's about ready to wrap his hands around Tony's throat, at which I finally claim responsibility for my actions.
June 1996 - Abel and I lose a bet and the penalty is that we both share and down a glass of grape Cisco aka "Liquid Crack." I down the entire glass of disgustingness, so that Abel won't have to. Just reminding him in case he forgets for some reason, how much I love him.
July 1996 - Me, Abel and T crash Geo's house where Geo proceeds to get drunk while the rest of us get lifted. After which the Longest Walk To The Store In History occurs. And, me and Abel proceed to go crazy because that Heltah Skeltah song is playing in the store, the one with the Motorola pager beep, prompting us to check out pagers in a high frenzy every four seconds.
Summer 1998 - Me, Tony, Abel and Dennis cause a ruckus in Los Angeles, the official San Diego bonfire and the Coke Museum in Las Vegas (where we proceed to drink as much Lychee Coke as our bladders can handle, and then some.)
1999 (And to be honest 94-03 as well) Abel and I terrorize all our friends by continuously whooping their sorry asses in Spades. Losers.
*okay let's skip ahead shall we or this is going to take too long*
July 2003 - Abel, Dean, Tony, Cue and Mike come visit me at the hospital, where I proceed to say "Hi, want to see my C-section scar, it has staples in it and looks like a scene from Hellraiser" as they walk in. While I show them the scar of course.
The rest of the time since then, has been filled with visits to see his beloved goddaughters and insistences that he does NOT, in fact, want to see this Antonio Banderas movie, even though he's watching it and just finished it. Like last night.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PATNA!!!!!!f
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