Crapo

I told you Jan-Michael Gambill is the Anna Kournikova of men's tennis. So dishy and yet he got blown off the court by an Andre Agassi who wasn't even really trying. Incidentally, I don't mean to sound like a typical female sports fan but... Is it my imagination or are an unusual quantity of players on the men's pro tennis tour really hot? I was watching Andy Roddick's game last night versus an uninspired Alex Corretja and I was struck numerous times by just how good-looking Andy Roddick is. He moved from my Top 15 into my Top 5 faster than one of his 141 mph serves. So that's Roddick, Gambill, Tommy Haas, James Blake... I even think Lleyton Hewitt is cute. Maybe I'm just biased because I like how tennis players are built, lean and tone. Okay I'll stop now before you guys start outfitting me in my J Crew sale rack tennis groupie clothes.

Does anyone else think this article is funny in a not-so-funny way? Like it's funny because poor little Lancey-Wancey won't be able to go on the little space shuttle anymore. But it's not so funny because Lancey had even $2 million to blow on a three-day ride and NSync sucks.

Do you want to know how to end up on a pushcart, roaring 120 mph into hell? Do what this guy did:

"Nun's rosary beads were used to kill her, Oregon authorities say

Sep. 4 - KLAMATH FALLS, Ore. -- The man accused of attacking two nuns on a bike path used the rosary beads they wore around their necks to control them while he raped both and left one dead, the district attorney said yesterday."

You know, I understand that some people aren't religious. What I don't understand is why those same people aren't a tad bit more prudent, JUST IN CASE. I mean, raping and then killing A NUN with her own rosary beads... he couldn't have been more sacrilegious if he did it on the altar. Satan's adding more logs to the bonfire even as we speak.

This crap trips me out too: "PENSACOLA, Fla., Sept. 3 � The trial of two adolescent brothers accused of bludgeoning their father to death with an aluminum baseball bat will be a mirror image of last week�s trial of a family friend." Okay, the boys were 12 and 13 when they did it, which is scary as hell. Even scarier is this line: "The brothers hoped to live with Chavis, who had taken them in when they ran away from home 10 days before the murder. Alex testified he had loved Chavis and had sex with him." Whaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhh? Um, eeew!!!!! But I guess if a 13-year-old kid can have a relationship with his 30-something teacher and have kids with her, a 13-year old can have a gay relationship with a 40-year-old man, right? Wrong!!! Eeeeew. I fucking hate child molestors. I hate them even more than I hate car thieves, which should really tell you guys a lot.

Okay, icky topics session over.

My company just sold me my Dell computer and fax machine for $100. Not bad huh? It's a pretty good machine too: 260 MB, 730 Mhz, Pentium 3. It's not as awesome as the machine I have at home (no, not that one... my computer) but for the next 45 nanoseconds, not much is.