Happy Belated Thanksgiving

Happy Belated Thanksgiving

I am so bad at wishing people happy holidays on time. I've been intending to send out Christmas cards every year for like 5 years but has it happened? Negative. This season it's going to happen though. I have no excuse. What else am I doing. I stayed at home this year for Thanksgiving, because me and my friends were too lazy to go anywhere else. We decided we're adult enough to make a traditional Thanksgiving dinner ourselves (Translation: George made a traditional Thanksgiving dinner FOR me, Net, Nev and Noble). I had an allergy attack right before dinner though and everyone knows that turkey by itself already makes you sleepy. Turkey + Benadryl means you might as well have taken a few sleeping pills and chased them with vodka. I fell asleep on the couch during dinner then bounced to my room before dessert was even served. It was still a pretty good Thanksgiving. The turkey and mashed potatoes were the best I've ever eaten, which is saying a lot because I eat like a pig. By the way, I am thankful for and to my family, my friends, Bailey, the fact that I have never had to worry about food or shelter, everything I have ever been blessed with and ESPN. Speaking of which...

Oooh it's Sunday. I think I'm about to blow a fuse in my eyeballs. Too much reading, watching TV and messing around on the computer. Not enough looking at flowers and trees and baby squirrels eating acorns. Yesterday I watched the E network or whatever it's called for like 6 hours. That's like 5 hours and 54 minutes longer than I've ever wtached it before. I watched their Top 20 Christmas Movie countdown and two E True Life Hollywood Stories on Growing Pains and Married With Children. I learned a whole lot of stupid but interesting things. For example, I always knew that people said Kirk Cameron ruined Growing Pains but I never knew that it was because he became a religious freak and fought the writers/producers on every storyline or piece of dialogue that even implied sin. By the way...

My Top 5 Christmas Movies Are:

1. How The Grinch Stole Christmas (The Jim Carrey version)
2. Yogi's First Christmas
3. Miracle on 34th Street (I like both versions, even the one with Dylan McDermott)
4. The Sound Of Music (Yeah I know this isn't a Christmas movie but they used to play it every Christmas when I was a kid so it counts)
5. Die Hard

Yeah I know Die Hard isn't a Christmas movie either but it was on the E Network's list and if they can consider it a Christmas movie then who am I to question the almighty E Network. I also like watching the televised ballet special of The Nutcracker but I figured that probably doesn't count as a movie. Geo thought I should put The Nightmare Before Christmas on there but at the risk of sounding un-pop-culturey I've never actually seen it.

I'm thinking of heading over to the mall. We went to Jersey Gardens on Black Friday and the sales were insane. The other shoppers were kind of insane too come to think of it, but I'm not going to throw stones from my glass apartment. I'm trying to stop myself from going to the mall because I don't want to blow anymore money, but it's hard because I had a really good shopping day last Friday. Shopping is like gambling. If you have one really good day you itch to go back after you've come home. By a "really good shopping day" I mean I was lucky enough to find my size in everything I wanted, I often got the last one of whatever I wanted and there were crazy markdowns all over the place. I went into Neiman Marcus (or it might have been the Saks Fifth outlet) and got this Kate Spade bag in a lilac color for $47. Forty-seven dollars for a Kate Spade bag. You know what that means don't you??? Instead of overpaying $205 for a purse with a label and marketing campaign that successfully preys on the insecurities of women, I only overpaid $42. What a steal!

Joke of the Day

A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He asks her,"Where are you going?"
She answers, "I'm moving to Las Vegas. I heard prostitutes there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free!"
Later that night on her way out the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase.
She asks him, "Where are you going?"
He replies... "I'm going to Vegas too. I want to see you live on $800 a year!"

Okay, I give in. After the Giants game I'm going to head over to the mall. Call me weak but I've never claimed to have an abundance of willpower. Anyone who's ever seen me drink would know this.