Late Night Thoughts

Late Night Thoughts

1. So I'm participating in National Novel Writing Month. But it's 2:48 in the morning and instead of writing my novel I am on here, writing about the fact that I'm supposed to be writing my novel. It's a vicious cycle. Dammit I left the spaghetti out. Hold on while I trek all the way across the house to the dining table.

2. I decided after last night's virulent Apprentice recap that I am no longer going to watch the show. YEAH RIGHT!!! Did anyone actually fall for that one? I didn't think so. I'll continue to watch until they boot Andy. Then I may have to stop because there will be no one left to cheer for. Well Kevin and Wes are okay.

3. Random Links:
Hello Kitty Auctions For Charity (That Judith Leiber purse has me drooling and I don't know why)
Television Without Pity (The Apprentice recap from two weeks ago is absolutely hysterical.)
PoshTots.com (In case any of you win the lottery and decide you want to buy my kids something essential like a $35,600 playhouse or a Cinderella carriage bed that is so expensive they won't even list the price.)
MarksFrigging.com (For all those people like me who want to listen to Howard but are not trying to get up at 6am.)
Payard.com (For people who like to jerk off to pictures of pastries also. I mean, for people who like to jerk off to pictures of pastries. No also.)

4. Mike J and Tony came over tonight, since I owed Mike dinner for taking me out for Indian food the other night. I don't know why but I have seriously been craving guacamole and Indian food these past few weeks. No I'm not pregnant, you crazy ass psychos. Anyway, I poured Geo and Tony some Seagrams on the rocks, grabbed Mike a Corona, then stood in front of the fridge for awhile to survey my options.

Me: Do you know when juice goes bad?
Tony: Check the date on it, it's usually good for awhile after that.
Me (turning to leave the room): Okay.
Mike J: oh... JUICE! I thought she said Jews.
Me (having to go back for that one): Yeah, I said "Do you know when Jews go bad?"
Tony: Hahahahahaha!
Mike J: They go bad sometimes.
Me Like the ones who don't fast on Yom Kippur go bad.

5. People who grow up here in the Northeast really love their seasons. I have to say that I'm not really a big fan of them. I miss a lot about California, but aside from my family and friends the main thing really is being warm. I miss being warm. It's only been a month or so since it got cold and I already can't remember what it was like to not freeze my ass off when stepping outside. Or near a window. That's another thing about growing up in California then moving out here. You don't really realize how important insulation is. Until you put that plastic Home Depot Saran Wrap crap over the windows and the wind pushes it in and makes a bubble. Did I mention how cold I was yet? I'm really cold.

6. There are two kinds of people in this world. The people who pee the moment they feel it (well not at that precise moment, but a short while later) and those who don't think about it until they are in the bathroom and thinking "Oh my God, this is the best pee EVER." I am the second type of person. Which is not good really. Did I mention I was supposed to be writing my novel right now?

7. Mike J and I are going to Target tomorrow. He apparently didn't learn his lesson from the last time. I am selfish and unreasonable and threatening and stubborn at Target. And I like to dawdle. I am also a big fan of tossing things into the cart that I can't afford so I can "own" them for 45 minutes. Actually, I am planning to spend my weekly "Frivolous Purchases" allowance in there. I'd spend it on Indian food but it's not really enough for a nice big meal, so I'll rock it at Target. See how parenthood changes your life. My whole paycheck used to be up for "Frivolous Purchase" grabs, but now I'm relegated to 20 dollars... and yet happy for it! Because 20 dollars can go a long way at Target. And eventually, Geo will lift the current embargo on useless items. Because he loves me, and I love him, but I also love useless items. Like this. Utterly useless. And yet so wantable.

8. Okay I'm getting sleepy. And when I get sleepy I start reaching for things to say. Better quit now while I'm sorta ahead.