March 11, 2007

Wiiiiiii, Meat Pies, Competitive Karaoke, Two Bottles of Sake and Three Bottles of Wine

Wiiiiiii, Meat Pies, Competitive Karaoke, Two Bottles of Sake and Three Bottles of Wine

On Friday, Abel, Steve and Mike came over for dinner, Guitar Hero and of course guitaraoke. Which I found out today, is the name of an actual video game but at my house it's playing the guitar and singing along. Courtesy of Mike, I am now in possession of a Nintendo Wii for an undetermined amount of time and WOOT, that shit rocks. I get all into it too, Geo just kicks back and swings his hand but I actually do the golf poses, full batting form and the bouncing around tennis dance. Afterwards, we had a midnight meal at Houlihan's. Movies watched on Friday: The Princess Bride, Gridiron Gang, Bewitched, The Guardian and 1/3rd of Miami Vice before I did us the enormous favor of switching the channel to a documentary on the history of Japanese knitting techniques.

On Saturday night, I headed into the city with Abel and Steve to do a consult with Yoni at NY Adorned (the guy who did my most recent tattoo) about the tattoo me, Tony, Steve, Geo and Mike are getting Abel as his birthday present. He picked out a Chinese fire dragon which Yoni is going to re-draw to the specifications we discussed. That thing is going to look hot, Yoni estimates it will take about 5 hours to do. After the consult, we walked over to Tuck Shop, a little Australian joint nearby because Steve was craving "meat pies" and "sausage rolls." Heh. Too many jokes. They were good, but I will pretty much eat anything that is in pie format. You could bake old socks and gravy into a flaky crust and there is an actual chance I'd try it.

After dinner we sat on a bench and tried to map out a plan for the evening. Steve had his guitar with him so he considered going back to his apartment to drop it off, then changed his mind because it'd be humorous to be randomly lugging around a guitar as we bar-hopped. We wandered back to Second Avenue and surveyed the territory for a suitable bar to start in. Across the street was a place that had no name, just a neon sign with a red rooster on it. So of course I said "I'm open to the possibility of going to the random bar that has no name, just a sign with a cock." We stood outside for awhile trying to figure out if we should go in or wander further, when I spied a menu board with the magic word on it, KARAOKE. Naturally, we went in. You know Asian people and karaoke. We live for that shit.

The place only had a couple of people in it, so we grabbed a mini-booth next to the karaoke hostess but by 9 it was packed. I sang a couple of songs ("Feed the Tree" by Belly and "#1 Crush" by Garbage) and then Abel said I had to sing "Sk8ter Boi" and dedicate it to Steve (Avril Lavigne is his What The). So for shits and giggles, I go up there to sing this ludicrous song and really throw myself into it. After the dedication "This goes out to my boy Stevie, who is the biggest Avril Lavigne fan in the entire world" I straight up belted the song out like I was on tour. Insane. Afterwards, Steve sang "Billie Jean" just so he could do the moonwalk onstage. Also, for some reason Steve and I decided it would be a stellar idea to consume two bottles of sake and three bottles of Pinot Gris. YES.

Abel and I would pop out for a smoke every so often and chat with the bouncer. He informed us that we weren't actually in the bar with the cock on it, that was a gay club. Abel asked him what funny shit he sees, sitting outside on Second Ave all night and he told us that he sees all kinds of crazy things because there was a Hell's Angels bar down the block, a skinhead bar next to it, a gay bar and then the gay club next to the place we were at. His exact words were "You ain't seen nothing until you watch a 6-foot tall transvestite painted blue and dressed as Smurfette beat the shit out of a skinhead." Oh my God, we were dying. Seriously, I'd pay good money to see something like that. Abel also asked him what kind of brawls he's had to break up, and he said that people fight because they get competitive over... karaoke. Of all freaking things to brawl over, that wouldn't have made it into the top 50 reasons on my list of things people could possibly throw punches over. Fucking hysterical.

At one point, I went up to sing "Have You Ever Seen The Rain" and the lyrics fizzled off the little prompter after the first sentence. The hostess re-started the song but inwardly I was freaking out a bit. One of the things I randomly held onto is the idea that I will forget song lyrics if they're not in front of me. Which is stupid because I always sing along with my iPod and don't screw up the lyrics. But I de-constructed it and it stems from this time in high school, when me and this girl Ann sung the duet from Phantom of the Opera "All I Ask Of You." I sang the soprano part and she sang the alto, but I was so nervous because the 300 members of the audience were right there on level with us (usually we sang in an auditorium and the lights kind of make you blind to the audience). Anyway, I straight out fucked this song up. My voice was shaky and I forgot the lyrics and so made up new ones "Say you love me every waking moment, kiss my hand and think of solitude" or some shit. It was awful.

So I'm in this joint, under the spotlight, no lyrics are coming and I'm freaking out a bit. But then I was like "Fuck it, you know you can do this" and belted out the song. Abel and Steve were cheering like mad because they know all about me and my random I-forget-song-lyrics hang-up. Steve pulled out his guitar right in the middle of the place and played along. It was awesome. And I have to throw some props out, Steve is pretty shy and he was not only getting up and singing songs in front of like a hundred people, he was actually going up to a few and serenading them. It was a good night. I woke up at 6 a.m. and said out loud "Where the fuck am I and how did I get here?" Abel fills in the details and I just start howling with laughter. And then of course responded "I'm hungry, you guys want to order food?" By the way, we passed out at 11 p.m.

Today, I sat outside my house for a bit and played my guitar. I was singing "Have You Ever Seen The Rain" again when a guy walked up to my fence and listened. After I finished the song, we started chatting about it and normally I would go into my house after like 10 seconds. But since the forum I view things pretty differently now so instead, I invited him to have a smoke and we talked for a bit about music. I mentioned that Geo played the drums and he said they were looking for a drummer for his band. He just moved in across the street and so now I have a new friend. Later on, Min came over for a bit and we Nintendo Wii-ed. Wii-ing rocks.

It was an awesome, awesome weekend.

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